Random acts of Madness

Last night I went to a boat cruise in aid of cancer research and epilepsy. It was black tie so I wore my kilt. I have no idea if that's what led to the randomness of the evening, but I like to think so.

First off, because I didn't particularly fancy walking through town in a kilt, I booked my second ever taxi in Southampton. It made it around the corner before it broke down. Pushing a taxi to one side whilst wearing full black tie wasn't quite what I'd had in mind for the evening. To make matters worse the driver gave rubbish directions to where we were so it took the replacement taxi a good fifteen minutes to find us.

But I got over it and continued onwards to the boat. Where I discovered there was a raffle (charity remember) which included in it's prizes a two litre keg of Grants Whisky. Since I was the only person there in Scottish dress I decided I was going to win it and since by this time I'd had a few drinks I announced that I was going to win it.

Six pounds worth of tickets later the first ticket was drawn. It was the first ticket I'd bought. The power of positive thinking I guess.

After the party ended I stashed the whisky in a friends car so I could go on to the pub. Unfortunately one pizza later they decided they were tired and were going to go home, so I went back to get the whisky and hence was on my own when I tried to get into the pub. Apparently they don't like someone who's admittedly slightly drunk going in with a two litre keg of whisky. Which is probably a good thing all things considered, I think I'd had enough to drink.

This did however leave me with no ride back through town and no-one to share the ridiculously priced taxi with. So despite planning to not have to walk through Southampton, I did. It wasn't actually that bad. Although in a further bizarre twist of fate I quickly discovered a rather attractive blonde lady walking with me. I'm not sure if she was trying to escape someone or if she was just bored like she said, but I decided I was going to walk her to the club she was going to. I also bought her a chocolate bar, because, well why the hell not? Unfortunately the club was a bit of a dive and not really feeling the need to be turned down entry I made excuses and legged it.

I then discovered that the reason the walk hadn't been that bad was because of said cute blonde girl. Every idiot and their dog wanted to know how I wore my kilt. Fortunately by this stage I wasn't too far from the flat so I managed to sneak through back roads with only a few oh so witty rejoinders. What do people expect you to say when they ask?

But the randomness didn't end when I got home. Oh no, I arrived to be informed that someone had broken into the flat. Steinar had heard the door open just after eleven and he came out a few minutes later to find a complete stranger in the kitchen. The stranger then ran out the front door. Steinar thinks the stranger had something under his arm but it was dark and he can't really say for sure. Nothing appears to have been taken anyway so no idea what was going on there really.

So at this point I did the only sensible thing and started drinking the whisky. It was the only thing that made any sense.