The current state of play

Okay. Buckle up because I've got a couple of months to catch up on and a lot has happened. Lets start with S and I getting together. And God it was great. I mean really great. She really is an amazing woman in so many ways. Not least that she had the guts to break up with me a week ago.

Yep, once again I screwed up a relationship. At least I'm consistent, right? Well I say I screwed up but to be honest in some weird way it wasn't working. It was subtle, I'll give it that, but it was somehow wrong. Sometimes I think that the whole dating friends thing will never quite work. Too much history in the wrong way.

But I'm okay with it. I mean I really am. She is an amazing woman in every way. Pretty much everything I could ever want from someone. Except the spark. You know what I'm talking about - the one little thing that makes a relationship work.

I'm reminded at this point of a penny arcade strip. Specifically this one. Love is such a funny word. It means so many things. In this case yesterday it meant that I was willing to spend the rest of my life with her. Today, after spending an hour waiting in the cold for her to get home from work (next time I do that I really must learn when she finishes work), it means a friend who I can rely on to tell me the truth no matter how much it might hurt her.

Also it means whisky (hey Dad, I spelt it right - this time at least). But that's because I've had too many this evening. About half a bottle to be exact. Who needs a liver anyway?

I've also realised that the problem with crazy, impulsive romantic gestures is that they rarely end up being romantic. That means they're just crazy and impulsive. Impulsive is good, but you end up in the cold freezing your arse off (and also looking vaguely threatening because you're wrapped up in so many layers apparently) and being really hungry. So all you're left with is crazy, which is never attractive. So I guess there must be more to a relationship than romance, like the rest of your life or something.

How does that work in polite society then?

This would probably be the point that I'd let it go and leave it for the comments, but strangely I find I can't (probably the whisky again). Oh, for the record, as two friends S and I decided that we needed to work out how the relationship worked before we told people, so if there is anyone reading this going 'who's S?' then really you need to phone me more. Yes, I'm guilty too. That's life, that is.

I'm going to go now.